Crossing the River

Some people have asked me how being pregnant in Cambodia is different than the United States.  I honestly can’t answer this question since I have never been pregnant in the United States before, but I can share my experience of pregnancy in Cambodia.  As I am now 7^th months pregnant, it’s becoming obvious to all that a child is coming soon.  I had hoped that pregnancy would be something that not only would bring us a child but would also be a way to break down barriers and start conversations with people around me.  In a country in which having children is a significant part of life, it has done just that.  All types of people smile at me, say hello, and are happy to see my growing belly.  It has really been a sweet time.  One adorable 2-year-old girl came up to me as I was seated at a church we were visiting and laid her head on my belly as if she knew her little friend was right there.

Some Cambodian women have suggested that after I have the baby I need to wear socks and gloves and drink hot liquids to make sure I stay warm.  Women in the countryside typically sleep with a fire beside their beds after delivery.  I am certainly not worried about being too cold after delivery since 80 degrees constitutes a cool day in Cambodia.  I have definitely been hot during this pregnancy and have been envious of Cambodian men who stand around talking to their friends with their shirts pulled up so that their bellies can cool down.

Marriage and having children are a standard part of life in Cambodia.  When people meet for the first time, one of the first questions asked is, “Are you married already or not yet?”  If someone is unmarried, instead of answering ‘no,’ the correct response is ‘not yet.’  If someone is already married, the immediate next question is “Do you have children already or not yet?”  If someone doesn’t have children, the appropriate answer again is not ‘no,’ but ‘not yet.’  The formal word for saying that someone is pregnant translates to something like ‘the area of the stomach,’ but people typically use the expressions ‘to have child,’ ‘big stomach,’ or ‘heavy.’  The most typical expression for delivering a baby is ‘to cross the river.’  As our Khmer friend told us when he explained the expression, “It’s a lot easier to cross the street than the river.”  While I initially agreed with him, after carefully considering his logic, I’m not sure it really applies to Cambodia.  I have crossed the street many times in Phnom Penh, and I cross the river on a small boat each week to get to the island church we attend.  I certainly have a greater sense of accomplishment when I make it safely to the other side of the street than I do the other side of the river.  In this case, I am hoping that my delivery is more like crossing a Cambodian river and less like crossing a Cambodian street!

--Katy